If Yuppies can't feed, Yuppies can't breed

So the DirtyBros will be embarking on an epic journey unrivalled in the realm of cycling this Saturday morning when they commence the infamous Stokesville-Douthat-Stokesville ride. The fabled trek includes over 160 miles and nearly 20,000 ft of climbing stretched out over two days. It will undoubtedly be interesting and should yield a blog far most satisfying than this epic piece of pony poo.

In other news, it looks as though I will be moving to the ‘burg. Yes, that’s right; the DirtyBros will once again be united under one roof yielding a situation that should quickly degenerate into the antics of yore. Late night political discussions fueled not only by massive amounts of Kirkland® products but copious amounts of alcohol, indoor track-stand practice, ‘goating’ on a new and unprecedented level, dodgeball with rancid fruit…and yes, the obligatory bare-assed-pressed-to-the-face-of-an-
unsuspecting-victim farting…only this time there will be no school to get in the way of our blatant and unrepentant irresponsibility. And when we screw up, and it will definitely happen, the consequences will be real and potentially detrimental to our health and socio-economic standing…which will only make it more thrilling and addictive. Yes, it looks like we’ve dodged the first bullet of the oppressive, regimented and confining ‘reality’ of adulthood…we’ll see how long we can hold the beasties off.